Six basic tasks for the next Barcelona board

Today was a bad day. In fact, it would be no exaggeration to say that it was one of the ten worst days of my life.

In the beginning, I did not feel much, because I expected to lose (and not just in a jinxing way, but for real). I mean Barca have been shambolic this year and Bayern are a machine. 

But then the scoreline started becoming a bit insulting, like 4-2 or 5-2 and I thought to myself "well, this is a bit much.". I switched to just checking my phone rather than watching every minute closely. And then the scoreline started becoming a bit funny, like 6-2 or 7-2. And I tried even harder to look at my phone, texting an Arsenal-supporting friend to ask if this is what he felt like when they played us and Bayern every year in the quarters. And then Coutinho tucked in his second of the day, after an assist, a tidy 10 minutes of work for a guy that Barca paid one hundred and twenty million euros for. And that led me to "delirious laughter" (immediate aftermath) to "numb shock" (30-60 minutes later) to "this is settling in now and feeling pretty depressing" (1-2 hours later).

Let us assume we live in a perfect world and that Bartomeu either resigns or is forced out in a vote of no confidence and there are elections held tight now and Font (or literally anyone else) comes to power and cleans house with this club's scouting, fitness, and coaching departments. What then? What might be on the agenda of the next regime? I have some thoughts:


The new regime must spend wisely and not like a drunk sailor

Obviously everyone knows about the 400 million spent on Dembele (who's played about as much as me), Griezmann (a great player and great guy but on literally the least suited team for his talents), and Coutinho (scorer and assister of the aforementioned three goals in ten minutes today). Enough of this madness. 

Buy smart, buy cheap. Don't go for big names unless they are absolute rock stars and south of 30. Trust your academy and the academies of other Spanish teams to produce guys that can be bought for reasonable sums. Think purchases like Rakitic, Dani Alves, or Ter Stegen. 25-50 million range. No more nine figure purchases, please.


The new manager must be a hardass

Teams under hardasses sometimes need a softer touch and teams under nice guys sometimes need a fire lit under their ass. Like all teams in sports, Barca generally swing from one pendulum to the other. 

It's time for a hardass.


Whether it's Pochettino or some random Dutch theorist, it's gotta be someone willing to make tough calls. This includes ...


Messi needs to rest more

Note I did not say "Messi needs to play less". Perish the thought. But his insistence on playing 90 minutes every game needs to stop. 

Over the last ten years in La Liga, he has played 1500 more minutes than anyone else and 3500 more minutes (basically a full season) than the next attacking player (via The Athletic).

He's intimidated managers long enough on this. He needs to sit his ass down against Eibar so he has the legs to run against Bayern. That is, of course, if he's still around (gulp)...


Convince Messi to stay

He's been a cranky boy for a months now and no one can blame him. Whoever comes in has to have credibility with him, either because they are a big name or because they're Argentine or whatever. Make no mistake, whatever rebuilding project has to be done will be a lot easier with the best player in the world (still). I find the beginnings of the Messi-backlash -- not yet in full force but appearing on the horizon, if message boards and social media is anything to go by -- highly distasteful and highly stupid. Mark my words, if you push him to City or PSG, he will win at least one CL and two league titles with those teams. 

I will say this though: someone else should probably be captain. He's the best player ever, and by far, but he's not a great leader. 


Core purchases: 2 full backs (one RB, one LB) + 1 DMF + 1 winger + 1 striker

This is the minimum. Alba is done at this level. Liverpool did not break him per se, it just was the final blow in a decline that had set in a couple years prior. Either way it was kind of a death knell and he has not been the same since. Semedo and Roberto, bless their hearts, are not CL-winning right backs (or even CL-competing right backs). If one of them was good enough, they would have made the claim to the position by now. I mean, Roberto is not even a RB for god's sake; he was only pushed into that role because Bartomeu pushed Dani Alves out and had no plan for his replacement (shocker). As for Semedo, you really have to wonder about the psychological impact of what Davies did to him today. It was pure filth. 

Busquets is done at this level. He is a squad player now. Barca need someone to play the 4 to free Frenkie.

A winger is crucial because since Alves, Pedro, and Neymar left within a couple years of each other, Barca have have had zero width beyond Alba's bombing runs. If they do not trust Fati in big games yet, and Dembele is always injured, then they need a winger.

Suarez is also done at this level. His lack of pace was sad to see. He is also a squad player now, someone you start against Levante and bring on in the 75th minute against good sides, if you are down a goal. But we need a killer in front of Messi so that he can just play as a no.10 off him. 

Of course, there are weaknesses up and down the squad. Some may feel Pique, for example, needs to be pushed out too. I am not so sure. Either way, these five positions is where to start. 


Core sales: Semedo, Rakitic, Vidal, Griezmann, Coutinho, Umtiti, Alba

Get whatever you can for these guys. Some are still good players and, depending on the club, may attract a reasonable fee. For the others, even if it's a pittance, just get what you can. 

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